How does this fucking guy sleep at night? Oh, on a giant pile of money. Right. Forgot.
I'm exhausted of pointing to the mountains of evidence that contradict Mr. Magoo here. In case you're unfamiliar with who Wayne LaPierre is, he is the executive Vice President of the National Rifle Association, and he has a vested interest in keeping the national discourse on gun control as far away from his organization as humanly possible.
And now this. Another tragic mass shooting. This time in the nation's capital. Aaron Alexis, the gunman responsible for the D.C Navy Yard shooting, legally purchased a pump action, law enforcement ready shotgun and proceeded to murder 12 innocent people. Are we talking about more robust, comprehensive background checks? Are we talking about the shortcomings of our health care system that allowed an individual obviously suffering from mental health issues hold a security clearance that allowed him access to the Navy Yard in the first place?
No. We're talking about Grand Theft Fucking Auto V. Ignoring the fact that the D.C. shooting took place on Monday at 8:15am and GTA V wasn't released until 12:00am on Tuesday the 17th, La Pierre still manages to rewrite reality to fit into his warped world view.
GTA V is capable of many things. Time travel isn't one of them.
“The evidence against Grand Theft Auto is not to be disputed. Clearly, excitement over the imminent release of this game led Mr. Alexis to commit celebratory murders,” said LaPierre. “Either that, or he was going on a ‘practice run’ in anticipation of playing this degraded piece of garbage.”
“To point fingers at anything other than Grand Theft Auto V for this tragedy is morally irresponsible,” LaPierre croaked.
Morally irresponsible...This coming from the guy heading an organization that helped pass a law in Iowa that will allow legally blind Iowans to carry handguns in public. The delusions continued as LaPierre went on to audition for the greatest Onion article never written.
“Were it not for Grand Theft Auto V—released mere hours after this heinous act—12 people would still be alive. What will it take for the American people to stand up and say, ‘Enough is enough’? When will the heartless criminals at Rockstar Games be made to answer for these outrages?
Yes, Rockstar certainly does have a long history of lobbying congress for its own ends and purchasing Senators wholesale. Rockstar is even powerful enough to have a sitting state Senator recalled from office. I think I speak for all of the adults in the room, Mr. LaPierre, when I say this:
You have somehow managed to shit all over another national mass shooting while attempting to deflect blame from, and we all know this, your organization which has consistently and systematically hamstrung any chance for a reasonable debate about gun legislation in this country.
The irony continued as LaPierre came up with some pretty creative measures that should help stem the almost weekly incidents of gun violence.
“If videogames were not so widespread and easy to get your hands on, this horrible act might never have happened. It’s high time Congress and our president backed sensible video game regulation. Anybody that wants to purchase a copy of Grand Theft Auto V must undergo a background check, a psychological evaluation, and a five-day waiting period. Most importantly, all copies of the game must be kept under lock and key when not in use.”
I mean, he's trolling. Right? He has to be.
LaPierre makes too much money off too many people to really care about comprehensive gun control, but when he attempts to apply the same regulations to video games as a Glock, you no longer get to be in the debate. Thanks to LaPierre we will continue to have the wrong conversations about this.
Rockstar thanks your for the free publicity and congratulations for now being below our collective contempt.