Thirst Level: 10

Mr. Laffer has earned our "Mr. Thirst" award. Since 1987 Larry has unsuccessfully tried to seduce attractive women through the most mediocre methods. He's been on the thirst hustle for so long that it's simultaneously commendable and pitiful. You would've thought that by now, Larry had realized he and fate were not the best of friends.

But he continues to get involved in life-threatening situations, all for the sake of the thirst. Seriously, he even contemplates suicide in the first Leisure Suit Larry game, if he doesn't lose his virginity. Larry wears his thirst on his sleeve and for that, he earns our VTP (very thirsty person) award.