Director: David Steiman
Stars: Bill Goldberg, Douglas Smith, Emilie de Ravin
Shitty Gift Equivalent: A book on dating written by Brett Ratner.

This isn't the first time we say it, and certainly won't be the last, but, generally speaking, professional wrestlers make poor leading men. This is doubly true of Christmas movies. Even a director who was once an assistant to eloquent genius Brett Ratner can't overcome the long odds of making a truly great film starring a former great WWE star. When it comes to works of art detailing Santa's descent into madness and the inevitable ensuing killing spree, we'll take Weird Al's musical version any day.