Dave (Jackie Earle Haley) reluctantly brings his wimpy freshman brother, Wendell, along on he and his buddies' (Tom Cruise, John Stockwell) road trip to score some action in Tijuana. Ever the dedicated (read: thirsty) one, Wendell basically pays for his spot in the whip with a cash loan.

The worst part is that this lame-o actually has no intentions of getting laid along with the rest of the guys on the trip. Instead, he's out to, get this, buy fireworks for cheap so he can sell them at an insanely high mark-up back at school. Go take that capitalist scheme on a different adventure, son.