Date: July 1
Tweeter: @ochocinco hacked @Evelyn Lozada
Tweet: "Any dudes want to send there [sic] last DM's to Evelyn before she gets married? I promise to relay the message..."; "While I'm on Evelyn twitter, why do y'all (woman) urinate and use half a roll of tissue to pat pat such a small area?"; "As men and I speak on behalf of all of them WE hate performing oral activities and coming to clean tissue that's been left behind..."

Seeing as how Chad Johnson lost his wife, job, and condo all in the span of a week, we'll take it easy on the wife-beating wide receiver and just say, this stunt should have served as a fair warning to Evelyn that the man who legally changed his last name to Ochocinco was fucking crazy.