You can't make this stuff up. Watch as police roll up on this drunken man-child cruising around in a stolen motorized scooter.

We love the part where a local news reporter interviews the rightful owner of the scooter.

Reporter: What kind of person would do something like this?

Scooter Owner: A terrible person!

The joyrider, a prototypical haggard-looking Cops reject, had a blood alcohol level three times the legal limit. His driver's license has been revoked since 1993. Can't Imagine why.

[via Gizmodo]