So, you coughed up the cash for tickets to that movie your lady's been dying to see. Or maybe you organized an elaborate surprise party, hitting up all her friends and family. Unfortunately for you, one viewing of a gushy Nicholas Sparks flick and you might as well have been on a Groupon date at Red Lobster.

What's a picnic in the park compared to a romantic evening spent caring for helpless sea turtles? Or slow-dancing together in the middle of an abandoned street? Or finding creative ways to help a chick accomplish everything on her bucket list? Better check those flowers and chocolates at the door, because your game's looking pale and generic next to the guy that's contacting the star registry to have one officially named for his girlfriend.

Sparks, corny as he is, is a crazy mastermind when it comes to concocting unconventional outings. And raising female expectations sky-high. Sorry, lazy daters.