13. "The Crate" (Short Story)

Original publication date: 1979

Leave it to Stephen King to make an ancient arctic monster every unhappy married man’s hero. In “The Crate,” famously filmed as the best segment in George A. Romero’s classic horror anthology flick Creepshow (for which King wrote the screenplay), Dexter Stanley, a college professor has the misfortune of being married to the world’s biggest B-I-T-C-H, a loud, obnoxious, forever drunk terror in women’s clothing. Every chance she gets, Stanley’s insufferable ball-and-chain humiliates him in public and slaps around his ego.

When a large crate is discovered beneath a staircase inside his school building, and kills the friendly old janitor, Stanley and his colleague hatch a scheme to lure his wife into the monster’s vicinity to do what no marriage counselor could ever legally do. Unless the counselor had a stomach big enough to digest a human and didn’t like his or her job all that much.