As Seen In: Titanic (1997)
The Perp: Jack Dawson (Leonardo DiCaprio)

Even if you are a professional artist like Jack Dawson, it’s best to leave the nude sketches to people (preferably females) who aren’t dating your girlfriend—because there’s no winning there. Rather than facing the inevitable screams of, “So that's what you think I look like” and wasting hours coaxing your girl out of a locked bathroom, don’t go there in the first place. No matter how romantic James Cameron makes it seem.