I’ve always wanted to write “Doomsayers” in a headline, but not for people like this. I guess I always pictured a “doomsayer” as some gigantic rock-skinned villain out of a comic book, not as some whiney, paranoid Americans who are probably related to the guy who sued his way to having “Caution: Hot” printed on McDonalds coffee cups.

According to a BBC article, five percent of Americans are convinced they suffer from EHS—that’s Electromagnetic Hypersensitivity for the other 95 percent of you. The alleged symptoms of EHS are as follows: skin burning, muscle twitching and chronic pain. So pretty much the most vague symptoms possible that could be attributed to pretty much anything, but I digress.

Luckily, for those that feel particularly at risk of being afflicted with EHS, there is a little slice of God’s country in Green Bank, West Virginia that is part of the US Radio Quiet Zone, an area of the country that bans wireless signals across a 13,000 mile stretch of land. The zone was created so as not to interfere with radio telescopes in the area (which I personally avoid because living there gives me really awful Radio Telescope Hypersensitivity Disorder).

My one question is, if these people are so worried they feel the need to move, what do they use to look up this magical “no Wi-Fi” spot, an encyclopedia?

[via Gizmodo]