There’s no better place for our favorite hashashin to disappear than UT-Austin. Given his propensity to blend in, we figure the best college for him would be the one that has a dorm (Jester Hall) bigger than New York (the state, not the city, although we’re including NYC). He could happily lose himself in the giant (50,000 strong) student body, and never have to say a word...until he stabs you in the back with a chopstick and takes five packs of your instant ramen and your last dubsack.