Crime: Is it already the beginning of the end for our man with the voice of God, Ted Williams? On Monday night, the newly famous homeless radio announcer and his daughter were both detained by the police after an altercation in which she reportedly swung on him and scratched his face. By Tuesday, they were both on talk shows sharing their sides of the story. We could really use his golden voice-over to make this story less sad. [NY Daily News]

Movies: An Andy Warhol portrait of deceased Chinese communist leader Mao Zedong sold for $302,500 after it was estimated to only fetch around 30 stacks. So why so much more money? And why do we even give a fuck? Well it turns out the piece was owned by Dennis Hopper, who—we're just going to assume some kind of acid trip was involved—pumped two slugs into the panting after he thought it was actually Mao. Top that Charlie Sheen! [Yahoo]

TV: Steven Hirsch, co-founder of the smut provider Vivid Entertainment Group, is lending Octomom a hand, by paying the February mortgage on her house, without her consent. It's no secret that Hirsch has wanted to feature her in some videos, and she has turned down his past requests. Keep strong, Octomom! We've seen some wild shit, and we're pretty desensitized to porn, but there's no way we could stomach Octomom's Gaping Gangbang. [TMZ]

Politics: After taking some heat the last couple of days, Sarah Palin fired back at her critics in a eight-minute video she released this morning on her Facebook page, claiming it's wrong to blame her past rhetoric for the tragedy in Arizona. Apparently, she was very serious because there was no eye winking nor did she have a deer's head in her hands. [MSNBC]

Books: Bill Hudson, ex-husband of Goldie Hawn and father of Kate Hudson, is shoppping a tell-all book about his former wife. Nice little tidbits include 12-hour sex marathons and Hawn's request for a open marriage. We're completely baffled about why he's shopping this book now; you'd think he would've done this long ago, back when people still wanted to have sex with Goldie. [NY Post]