Def Jam Rapstar just announced seven new tracks, including "Lean Back," "Slow Jamz," and "Findum Fuckum & Flee." Wait, no, that's a typo. That third song is actually "Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Can See." [Rapstar]
Valve O.G. Gabe Newell, who recently got into bed to share sloppy kisses with PS3, calls working with Xbox Live a "train wreck." Is that why you refuse to issue the promised-for-years XBL update for Team Fortress 2? We've got blue balls over here, big man. [Games Radar]
The worst gaming slogans, like, ever. Though we have no idea how they overlooked the classic campaign "Extreme Anal Domination, Courtesy of PSP!" [Game Informer]
Xbox Live Arcade numbers for August just came out, and—wait, 2 million people bought UNO? Oh, that's cumulative. Thank God. [Gamasutra]
Red Dead Revolution may be the title of a not-officially-announced sequel to Red Dead Redemption. Which is awesome because it sounds like it involves Lenin. Hooker-hogtiers of the world, unite! [MCV]
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