The great thing about porn is that it lives forever: on our hard drives, under our mattresses, and in boxes in the attic labeled "LINENS." So whether a porn star finds Jesus and turns their back on the sex industry, dies, or gets abducted by a ship of aliens who want to probe them for research, we always have photos and film of them doing the deed. But of course people are born, pass away, and pass out in their own bodily fluids. Which is why it falls to Complex to provide some context. Because if you don't know your (porn) past, how can you know your (porn) future?
4/09, SETH ROGEN APPEARS ON THE COVER OF PLAYBOY WITH HOPE DWORACZYK
• She's on two things: Girls Next Door, and boyfriend Jason Kidd's tip. He's the ninth person with a penis to grace the cover of the magazine (not counting Chyna). How can this go wrong? Besides Jason Kidd showing up at the shoot and meanmugging the chubby Jew the whole time, we mean.
4/22/52, MARILYN CHAMBERS BORN IN PROVIDENCE, R.I.
• From white soap to to blue films to green doors, the late Chambers is like the Lucky Charms of porn... save for the fact she's now dead, and we've never seen marshmallow zombie pornstars in our cereal. Well, except that time that mushrooms were involved.
4/22/02, LINDA LOVELACE DIES IN DENVER, COLO.
• The woman born Linda Susan Boreman shot to fame (zing!) in the enormously successful 1972 hardcore porn film Deep Throat, then some other stuff happened, then she died from massive internal injuries after a horrible car accident. *clears throat* Man, remember when she was in Deep Throat?
4/23/71, SWEET SWEETBACK'S BAADASSSSS SONG COMES OUT
• You know how dedicated to the craft of filmmaking auteur Melvin Van Peebles (Mario's dad) is? For the sake of authenticity, he bit the bullet and had actual penetrative sex on camera. Then he got an STD and successfully sued for workman's compensation. So much for stickin' it to the man.
4/25/81, BRIAN PUMPER BORN IN HEMPSTEAD, N.Y.
• The rappin'-ass pornstar is best known for his
awesome rapspassing resemblance to Lloyd Banks. And for the fact that he got fired last year for forging the results of a chick's STD test. What's wrong with that? He just did it for the (money), the (money) the (money), the (money), the (CAKE!).
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