The Bloc is hot, the Bloc is hot...
We're proud of you, Czech Republic. When we heard the news yesterday that the Czech Republic was joining the boycott of this week's U.N. conference on racism over anti-Semitic comments by Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, we felt inspired. Yep, so inspired that we decided to honor the former Soviet state with a countdown of its sexiest women.
Really though, a pictorial nod to this Slavic hotbed was long overdue; the Czech Republic breeds jaw-dropping females like the D.R. does baseball prospects or Williamsburg does dudes you want to sock in the face. The country is renowned for a seemingly never-ending supply of swimsuit models and (too-hot-for) porn stars. (Quick note to Angel Dark fans: You'll have to wait for Worldwide Wednesday: Slovakia, coming soon.) It was certainly a chore *chortle* to whittle down all these Veronikas and Verunkas, but that's why we get paid the medium bucks. But enough with the formalities: Read on to see the 9 hottest women of the Czech Republic...
HONORABLE MENTION: ALENA Å EREDOVÃ
CLAIM TO FAME: The former Miss Czech Republic (1998) is married to Italian fútbol goalkeeper Gianluigi Buffon. We wonder: Who's been hit with more balls to the face?
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#9. KAROLÃNA KURKOVÃ
CLAIM TO FAME: We thought this Victoria's Secret Angel was just another cold Slavic ice princess until we heard the following skit on a Pharrell mixtape:
...then we thought: TRIFEY ALERT! Like the "hand job with my mouth" kind.
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#8. ANETTA KEYS
CLAIM TO FAME: The first of several adult stars on our list, Ms. Keys was reportedly recruited to become a nude model after a scout spotted her rollerblading. Sweet. Even sweeter: She's shared the screen (and bodily fluids) with #2 in our countdown.
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#7. (TIE) VERONIKA FASTEROVÃ (top) and MELISA
CLAIM TO FAME: It can be a fine line between "regular model" and "adult starlet." Neither of these all-natural, perfect-body beauties would look out of place in an expensive ad campaign, yet they both get naked for money. Damn you, absent father figures.
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#6. (TIE) DENISE MILANI (top) and JANA DEFI
CLAIM TO FAME: We're convinced that the Commies did something to the water before the breakup of the Eastern Bloc, because damn if the former Soviet states don't produce some of the most naturally two-rrific women we've ever seen (word to Busty.nl). Narrowing it down to Denise (32DDD) and Jana (32G) was like searching for the most luscious, ripest, roundest melons in a towering stack at Whole Foods. Yup, exactly like that.
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#5. VERONIKA ZEMANOVÃ
CLAIM TO FAME: The chestiest models usually have more questionable grills than barbecues in mainland China, but not beautiful Veronika. This Internet star retired from nude modeling in 2004 and reportedly had some sort of breast enhancement surgery during her career. But, really, who cares? Remember, it's not the boob jobs that turn us off, it's the bad boob jobs.
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#4. (TIE) EVA HERZIGOVÃ (top) and DANIELA PEÅ TOVÃ
CLAIM TO FAME: Two (relatively) older supermodels that are veterans of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. These are the type of Czech girls we love—independent, smart and fluent in multiple languages, with just enough of that "Don't even fucking think about talking to me" aura that makes us want to move to Prague.
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#3. VERONIKA VAREKOVÃ
CLAIM TO FAME: She's an eight-time veteran of the SI swimsuit issue and yet another incredible Czech beauty. To quote the homie Nature: When Veronika walks into a room, you will feel a slight breeze.
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#2. LENKA GABOROVA
CLAIM TO FAME: We normally don't like to put "adult stars" this high in the countdown, but we just had to make an exception for Lenka. She's so darn pretty we almost feel bad that she chose such a lurid profession. Almost.
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#1. PETRA NEMCOVÃ
CLAIM TO FAME: Go ahead and put her face on a dime, because this woman looks amazing in every photograph we've seen of her—and believe us, we've seen a lot. Even a tsunami couldn't hold her down. Congrats, Petra. You deserve it!
