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This is our review of Jaden Smith’s new album Cool Tape Vol 2.
Deep space. Earth is barely visible, just a blue dot in the distance.
The boy is from a kingdom, from a planet, from the fourth galaxy away. He stands on top of an asteroid, hurtling through space. In the boy’s native land, it’s not uncommon for people to ride an asteroid through space and go to Earth. This is a pretty dope thing for them to do, but not everyone is capable of harnessing an asteroid and flying that shit through space, so only the most experienced can make the trip.
The asteroid is the size of the Epcot Center and is straight careening through these galaxies. The boy stands on the top of the rock and stares out into the blackness. Planets are flying by him but he is unfazed by the magnitude of this experience. This is slight work for the boy. Most of the people from his home planet who make this trip are around 30 Earth years old. The boy is about half that age.
He has trained for the Earth trip his whole life. On his home planet, he would be regarded as royalty. He has no worries. He has none of the fears or concerns that others from his home planet might experience. The boy has only studied. While others toiled away at trivial tasks, he watched film on how to find an asteroid, and fucking jump on it when it passes by. It is not an easy task by any means. Asteroids are huge and going so fast, and the boy isn’t even 6 foot.
But he did it. Eventually the boy tracked an asteroid that was cruising by and he got on. Now he has to figure out how he’s going to land safely on Earth.
Earth is directly in front of the boy. The blue dot that was once just a speck is now massive, the outlines of the continents are clear. The boy needs to immediately figure out how to safely land this asteroid.
He breathes deep and thinks. He thinks so deep. He’s thinking about how he’s thinking about what he’s thinking about to the 10th degree. He looks at the asteroid in a way no one has ever thought to look before. He lays down on the asteroid and thinks:
“What is this made of?”
“Why is this asteroid flying through the universe?”
“What causes this rock to move so fast?”
“What if this asteroid is Earth, and ‘Earth’ is really the asteroid on its way to destroy this?”
Suddenly the asteroid starts glowing. Soft at first, but then brilliantly bright. The boy continues to lay on the asteroid and think. He breathes.
“What if the asteroid only existed in my universe, and Earth can’t even recognize it?”
“What if this asteroid is not here?”
“What if… this asteroid isn’t real?”
A blinding flash of light. Then black.
The boy is in the Pacific Ocean, swimming to the shore.
Jaden Smith – Cool Tape Vol. 2: 8/10
