Random News of the Week Featuring J. Cole's Twitter Rant and Chance The Fencer

Jun 23, 2013

We see a lot of really random shit every week. Deciding what to post and what to ignore is a constant balancing act that requires much skill, judgment, and discretion. Sometimes it depends on how drunk we are or how trollish we're feeling. Instead of simply letting these things pass us by, we decided to keep track of them and gather them all together for this post, which we'll do weekly, maybe. These are the kinds of things P&P writers email each other like, "ROFL omg WOW." Welcome to the party.

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We see a lot of really random shit every week. Deciding what to post and what to ignore is a constant balancing act that requires much skill, judgment, and discretion. Sometimes it depends on how drunk we are or how trollish we're feeling. Instead of simply letting these things pass us by, we decided to keep track of them and gather them all together for this post, which we'll do weekly, maybe. These are the kinds of things P&P writers email each other like, "ROFL omg WOW." Welcome to the party.

2. Gunplay introduces us to the rare "Lobster Dog"

Gunplay asks, "have you ever seen a lobster dog?" Sadly we shake our heads. "No Gunplay, we have not. Thank you for opening our eyes to the rarest of dog breeds."

3. Andrew W.K. breaks the world record by drumming for 24 hours straight

Earlier this week, we brought you the news that Andrew W.K. was attempting to break the world record for longest period of continuous drumming in a retail store. Well, ever the extreme partier, Andrew beat it. Roots drummer Questlove was on hand to offer support during it and captured the above Vine towards the end of Andrew's 24 hours. PARTY ON!

4. Here's a compilation of vocal fails by male singers in rock

Because why not? Check out the full reference of what's included below:

1. 0:00 - Tenor James LaBrie showcases how it is done: hilarious voice crack while trying to nail the high E (E5) during the live performance of "Under the Glass Moon".

2. 0:08 - High baritone Ozzy Osbourne's mighty falsetto crack while performing "Crazy Train" live, he seems to be under a suicide solution in the picture.

3. 0:17 - Unexpected live crack by low tenor Freddie Mercury during his off-night (nodules truly suck).

4. 0:20 - Low baritone Axl Rose and his crooning low register... Seriously though, what the hell is this? Recent Rock in Rio live performance of "Knockin' on Heaven's Door" had this weird note in it, what were you thinking while hitting it, Axl?

5. 0:28 - Axl imitating boat motor during the live performance of "Perfect Crime" in Indiana, how the hell his voice recovered after that I have no idea...

6. 0:42 - Hysterical cracks during the "Whole Lotta Love"-performance from Live Aid by tenor Robert Plant, the whole performance ranks among one of his worst.

7. 0:53 - Plant fails imitating the guitar and cracks, resulting in lots of laughter. Nice try though (and he goes really high later during the performance).

8. 1:03 - Tenor Sebastian Bach's Grandpa Simpson-moment from the live performance of "Gethsemane (I Only Want to Say)".

9. 1:12 - Lots of mindless non-modal screams by Bach from the same performance to make it even worse...

10. 1:25 - Legendary live crack during Live Aid by low tenor Simon Le Bon during "A View to a Kill", this was heard by millions (luckily the rest of the performance was spot-on).

11. 1:30 - Low tenor Bruce Dickinson is usually known for nailing the live vocals but this surely was one of his worst nights: he fails hitting almost all the high notes during "Hallowed Be Thy Name".

12. 1:50 - Another metal legend with generally incredible vocals, low tenor Rob Halford has extremely hard time repeating the vocals of "Painkiller" here. Like a fellow youtuber said, he sounds like an angry elf here.

13. 2:20 - Halford fails the ending of the same song during the same performance, he must've felt awful after this.

14. 2:34 - High baritone Ian Gillan cracks lots of times while singing the chorus of "Highway Star" live.

15. 2:52 - More cracks from the same performance...

16. 3: 03 - Minor crack by tenor Adam Lambert (who is mostly flawless live) during the live performance of "Sleepwalker".

17. 3:05 - Infamous live performance of "For Your Entertainment", Lambo hits the high note in completely different key but quickly regains his strenght and finishes the note well.

18. 3:15 - Subtle crack by low tenor Matt Bellamy while singing "Megalomania", nothing too bad though.

19. 3:23 - And finally for the big finale (no pun intended!): back in the day low tenor Meat Loaf had one of the most powerful voices at the time (RIP), his really recent performance during AFL Grand Final proves how time goes by. I don't know how to describe this colossal amount of failure but Loaf fails with all the notes he hits during "I Won't Do Anything for Love" and sounds like constipated crying giant while screaming his epitaph.

20. 4:24 - More disastrous vocals by Loaf, this time from "Bat Out of Hell" during the same live performance.

21. 4:30 - And more (this time with lots of cracks during one note)... Confusion ensues as Meat Loaf releases out his warcry.

22. 4:48 - Oh god, what is this!? Loaf goes up to C5s of "Bat Out of Hell" during the same performance and sends the bat back to hell. This was probably one of the saddest vocal moments in the history of rock music.

5. J. Cole goes on a Twitter rant

When J. Cole wasn't promoting his latest album, Born Sinner, last week, the rapper was busy firing shots at the the role of media in hip-hop. Cole took to Twitter to let loose a slew of tweets on how album sales and critics are "fucking up hip-hop."

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jcoletweet2

He then rattles off some rappers who are, in his opinion, helping save hip-hop:

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Seems he forgot one name on his list though :/

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dannytweet

Damn, guess J. Cole also let Danny down.

9. Yeezus, as read by European tourists in New York City

In another episode of "LOL HIP-HOP," The Daily Beast walks that thin line between funny and tasteless/disrespectful by getting some tourists in New York City to recite some Yeezus lines that they have no business reciting.

10. Life advice from 2 Chainz

"Drink good, smoke good." Well, OK then.

11. The-Dream on why R&B matters

"R&B is the closest point to the reality of love that there is. It's the closest point. Other music and genres, they're slightly – from R&B, there's a big gap of how close love is involved in the song. That's what rhythm and blues is based on; it's based on love and heartbreak. You need it because that's real life. So, when you take real life out of a song, suddenly we're dancing to a song that doesn't mean anything, that has nothing to do with my life after this. Like after I leave the club, then what?"

(NPR)

12. Dev Hynes gets down to MJ

If you follow Dev Hynes on any social media outlets, you know he fucks with Michael Jackson. Here's more proof in the form of a Vine showing how Dev gets down to "Jam."

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13. Empire Of The Sun on how important beats are to their success

"I think we could do a beatless record. I really do. When we actually first got together [to record] in New York, we were working at a studio that was run by blind people, and we did quite ambient stuff with just voice, and some strings. It was absolutely beautiful. We will meet that place at some point, but at the moment, we're having too much fun dancing."

(Spin)

14. Chance The Fencer

Whoa, if this whole music thing doesn't work out for Chance, at least he has a possible career in fencing.

15. Danny Brown hangs out with Die Antwood

Really hoping Die Antwood's Watkin Tudor Jones was giving Danny some album cover pointers for his upcoming Old, you know?

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