Here’s a new single from Death Cab For Cutie‘s upcoming album Codes and Keys, out May 31. As a serious blogger, I should try to stay on task, since a new Death Cab single is big news, but I just got back from a Lil Wayne show. Can we just talk about Nicki Minaj’s ass in real life? After seeing that, everything else just seems so insignificant. My life goals just disintegrated. The 7 wonders of the world went limp, and all the other passions I have ever known shriveled up into a little cluster of nothingness and vanished into nowhere.

You know how they say that right before you die, your whole life flashes before your eyes? Well at the exact moment that you first lay your eyes on Nicki Minaj’s ass in real life, your whole life memory disappears. Everything you have ever learned, all the things that have made you who you are – gone. You are no longer an individual – you’re just another person who has seen Nicki Minaj’s ass in real life. I have no idea where things go from here, but I feel complete. Love you, Nicki. Sorry, Death Cab.

Death Cab for Cutie – You Are A Tourist