If you have ever at any point in your life—even while totally blasted off pickleback shots—doubted the ability of Pornhub to somehow remain in headlines practically every month for the foreseeable future, then this article probably isn't for you. Then again, maybe it is or maybe none of this even matters at all because we are all hurdling toward some unknown end or equally unknown new beginning. And before each human gets to this theoretical final plane, they will likely have used Pornhub for academic research at least once 338,294,014 times in their life.

Speaking of research, enter Page Six with a new report claiming that the pertinent porn providers at Pornhub have been trying to land proven fan Kanye West as the creative director for their upcoming awards show. "There are some insane negotiations going on," the alleged Six source said Monday, adding that West has recently "in talks" about the creative director position for the first-ever Pornhub Awards throwdown at the beautiful Belasco Theatre in Los Angeles.

Pornhub caught an immediately excerpted and viral-ized shout-out from West during his return to Jimmy Kimmel Live last month. In their initial response to West telling Kimmel he's still down with Pornhub viewing sessions, a rep announced the company had decided to ensure that West never paid a dime for any of their premium content in the future.

Though it seems unlikely West will be able to accept this latest offer, perhaps we can at least get him on an upcoming episode of Asa Akira's excellent Pornhub Podcast. The latest episode of the hour-plus discussion series featured I LOVE YOU director and general multi-hyphenate Brooke Candy, whose Pussy Riot-assisted new single "My Sex" should easily be able to find a home among the other cuts currently in your regular rotation.

Seriously—don't fucking sleep on this, squidbrains: