Well, it’s been an interesting couple of hours on Twitter, hasn’t it? Not long after Nicki Minaj sounded off about VMA snubs, Meek Mill decided to get in on the action. The Philadelphia rapper put Drake on blast, accusing him of using ghostwriters, and you’d better believe that Twitter had opinions. One user in particular sent a strong message to Meek Mill:
Toronto Councillor Norm Kelly made sure everyone knows where his loyalty lies. Meek Mill is scheduled to visit Toronto on July 28th as part of Nicki Minaj’s Pinkprint Tour, but it looks like Norm won’t exactly be rolling out the welcome mat.
So, we’ve gotta know: is Norm Kelly a true Drake stan, or a fair-weather bandwagoner? Maybe the best place to look is his Twitter timeline. It turns out Norm has tweeted about Drake no fewer than 40 times since March, somehow finding a way to spin any semi-viral Toronto-centric happening into a winking dad joke about The Boy. His “Drake reacting to…” series alone has racked up hundreds of retweets. Norm Kelly tweets about Drake constantly, but the question remains: is he a real fan? What’s his score on the Drake level of TheRapTest? Will Norm cop front row seats to OVO Fest with our tax dollars, or will he be on the lawns with the REAL fans? TORONTO NEEDS TO KNOW.
Norm Kelly seems to have recognized what so many brands and politicians already know: a shortcut to success on Twitter is embracing (and in most cases, co-opting) youth culture. Not only does he tweet about Drake, in the last month, he used “on fleek” in a sentence, he said “subtweeting is for cowards,” and he’s even exchanged words with The Based God Lil B. Does this break anyone else’s brain? At your next function, don’t be surprised if Norm walks up with a skateboard and drops a “How do you do, fellow kids?”
There’s really only two possible explanations here: either Norm Kelly is secretly a teenager with the same condition Robin Williams had in the movie Jack, or he has a person of youth on staff keeping him up to date on all the dankest memes. If he posts a photo of the 2001 Degrassi cast and captions it “Squad Goals,” we’ll know the latter is true. Is Quentin Miller ghostwriting Norm Kelly’s tweets, too?
Hey, Norm: if you’re reading this, it’s not too late. In order to refute these allegations, and confirm your status as an authentic Drake stan, we need the following pieces of information:
1) How many times did Drake visit Weezy on Riker’s Island?
2) What’s the name of Drake’s character on Ice Age 4: Continental Drift?
3) Describe the shape of the birthmark on Drake’s inner thigh.
4) Define "WOE."
Those are three pieces of trivia that only a TRUE Drake fan would know.
Bonus question: What is your username on KanyeToThe?
Here’s one more theory: Norm is the councillor for Toronto’s Ward 40, in Scarborough-Agincourt. Could he be one of the “real ones” livin’ past Kennedy Road that Drake describes on “Energy”? Almost definitely, right?
On the bright side, at least one Toronto politician is making an effort to learn a thing or two about hip-hop—we can’t say the same for our Mayor. Check out a selection of Norm Kelly’s most recent Drake tweets, and a few classic cuts. Is Norm a card-carrying member of #DrakeHive? You be the judge. Stay woke.