10 Times Rappers Were Hopelessly Out of Their Element

Image via Complex Original

Considering his past troubles with hard drugs, how many times he’s been arrested, and his recently revealed diet of devouring dog food, you might assume Dark Man X ain’t afraid of nothing. But, during a recent trip to an amusement park in Orlando, Fla., cameras on the Sling Shot ride captured a never-before-seen side of the hardcore rapper as he tried to keep his composure in between Tourette syndrome-like bursts of uncanny expletives. Needless to say, it was a Ruff Ryde.

Teyana Taylor might possess the body of a well-oiled athlete. Her backside might even resemble the roundness of two high school regulation Spaldings. But ball is definitely not life for the G.O.O.D. Music artist. The singer was recently a guest at the Jordan XX9 First to Fly event in Las Vegas where footage was taken of her inexplicably trying to display her defensive prowess (or lack thereof) in front of a large crowd. She ends up getting crossed so bad she disappears from view. The crispy pair of wolf grey Air Jordan 3s she was rocking didn’t deserve that.

Bow Wow has been running with Snoop since he was a little pup, but apparently his lungs never matured enough to stomp with the big dogs. Mr. 106 and Park recently tried to keep up with Uncle Snoop, Daz, and crew during a session smoking on a rare and potent bud called Caviar Gold, but failed miserably. Unable to hang, Bow is KO’d only missing a pacifier and blankee to make the scene complete.

During his career, which spans over a decade, it’s hard to name something that 50 Cent has failed miserably at. That’s until he tried his hand at America’s pastime. Earlier this year, in the name of album promotion, he threw out the first pitch at a Mets game. An obviously unprepared Fif’s clunky wind up and awkward southpaw delivery resulted in a throw that was so off the mark it would have made Smalls from The Sandlot proud.

Trinidad Jame$ burst on the scene with the 2012 hit “All Gold Everything” then failed to make any music anyone wanted to hear thereafter. But things got a lot worse for the ATL rapper when he spit a freestyle on Tim Westwood’s show in late 2013. What started out as an opportunity for Jame$ to show he actually has some skills, turned into one of the worst freestyles by a major label rapper the Internets have seen, with Trini awkwardly and unsuccessfully searching for bars in Westwood’s wall of records. Don’t believe us? Just watch.

Game likes to rap about how he once was pretty good at basketball, enough that he could have gone pro. But let’s not get it twisted: Rap is life for the Compton native. That doesn’t stop the cocksure rapper from frequently lacing up the Nikes and catching a run. He usually plays pretty well too, but Chuck’s pride took a shot back in 2011 when he got caught slipping during a Summer League game and put up brick after brick.

In the late '90s, Canibus was a lyrical beast, able to leap tall buildings with awe-inspiring metaphors and spit a barrage of multi-syllable words about shit that went over your head but made your eyes pop. So, when his career had stooped to the level of dissing J. Cole for no reason whatsoever, many people figured he could make a comeback on the Battle Rap scene and be able to wow us like before. In his one battle with Dizaster, he wowed, alright. Like, “Wow, did this dude really pull out a notebook during a battle? Wow, this is really what Canibus has become? Wow, this sucks balls.”

Riding motorized bikes is a hobby for a number of rappers. For some reason, we don’t think Young Buck is one of them. That didn’t stop the Tennessee rapper from hopping on a Harley a few years back in Detroit. Things start off great. Buck looks the part, decked out in motorcycle apparel. After confidently maneuvering the idle two-wheeler like a pro, shit gets real when he cranks the engine and decides to ride off into the sunset only to be intercepted on his journey by the asphalt.

Even at 44, Jay Z is the quintessential cool MC. When he’s looking cool, that is. In recent years, with more and more intimate pictures surfacing of the Brooklyn bar layer, we are starting to learn the suave buck might stop there. Flicks of simple tasks like Jigga gracelessly diving, clumsily riding a bike, and manipulating footballs and basketballs like a 4-year-old prove that his childhood suffered from his father’s absence even more than his music leads on.