Whenever something even vaguely resembles a penis, humans immediately react with maturity and piousness.
Actually, according to cursory research, that's never happened. Instead, images like this one shared by the International Business Times last week are traditionally met with various versions of "DICK! IT LOOKS LIKE A DICK! IT REALLY LOOKS LIKE A DICK!"
The unabashedly phallic creature is—no joke—known as a "peanut worm." According to the Times, these dickish creations are capable of both sexual and asexual reproduction. The now-viral image of the peanut worm engaging in an act of peanut worming is part of a larger report on sea creatures observed by a Museums Victoria expedition team in the Australian abyss.
In a statement Friday, the Museums Victoria’s Senior Curator of Marine Invertebrates spoke of the many wonders of Australia's "abyssal plain" without making a cock pun even once. "We're really excited about the discoveries that we've made and are thrilled that we can now share them with the Australian and international public," Dr. Tim O'Hara said.
Apologies to Dr. O'Hara, but we must now transition into a bunch of embedded tweets pointing out the knob-like appearance of this "peanut worm."
Stay out of the water.
