Isn't the human body wonderful? Nature knew that, one day in the future, humans would require a hidden storage compartment for hauling dubiously acquired gold. Eons later, here we are seeing nature's foresight put to good use by way of a Royal Canadian Mint worker alleged to have smuggled $180,000 in gold using that aforementioned storage compartment: his ass.
Leston Lawrence is accused of periodically taking "pucks" of gold via his own rectum and scrapping them at Ottawa Gold buyers in the Westgate Shopping Centre, with the Edmonton Journal reporting he eventually netted $180,000 ($140,000 in U.S. dollars). "This is the Royal Canadian Mint, your Honour, and one would think they should have the highest security measures imaginable," defense attorney Gary Barnes said during his closing submissions in an Ottawa courtroom on Tuesday. "And here the gold is left sitting around in open buckets."
The process of dude getting busted kicked off when a bank teller noticed the "size and number" of checks being deposited from Ottawa Gold Buyers, in addition to Lawrence's frequent requests to wire money to other countries. Security officials were tipped off, at which point an investigation was put into motion that eventually resulted in a search warrant and the discovery of "Mint-style" pucks in a safety deposit box.
During the trial, officials presented a container of Vaseline that had been found inside Lawrence's locker and an explanation of the prosecutors' allegation of anal concealment of the pucks. Such a method, officials argued, would have helped metal detection devices from being triggered during transportation. The defense, however, has argued that there are plenty of ways Lawrence, 35, could have legitimately copped some gold. Lawrence now faces multiple smuggling-for-case charges and has since been terminated from his position, the Ottawa Citizen reported. A decision on moving forward with these charges is expected Nov. 9.