5. Heavy Rain
Thirst Level: 9.83
So, maybe now would be a good time to briefly define "THIRST BLINDNESS." THIRST BLINDNESS is a condition that doesn't allow someone to think coherently. They're so thirsty that they don't realize they're either making an ass of themselves, or they're making irrational (and even harmful) decisions.
In the case of Paco (and a few other people who have appeared and will appear on this list), he doesn't realize either of the two. He's so blinded by the thirst that he actually considers it acceptable to point a gun at Madison Paige, and force her to strip for him. You should know better than us, Paco: Bands will make her dance. Not guns. (Although, obviously, you could make the argument that guns make women dance. But it probably intensifies the mood, and not in a good way.)