Hollywood Slingin': The 10 Worst Games Based On Movies

Hollywood Slingin': The 10 Worst Games Based On Movies

A few days ago we were paging through the week's video game releases, just to make sure we hadn't missed anything, and curled up nice and cozy was something called Grease: The Game. Yes, THAT Grease. Somehow, 32 years after the '50s-themed musical was released, it's turned into a collection of Wii minigames based on what is apparently an irresistible blend of sockhoppery, weird condom jokes, and Stockard Channing butching it up in a pink jacket. At first glance, it would appear to be the most bizarre video game ever to be adapted from a movie...but is it? Is it really? Turns out there are lots of games that go far beyond the usual merchandising gold rush when a popular movie comes out, resulting something that is an incomprehensible mess and/or psychologically scarring for developer and player alike. So feel free to watch the 10 movies these games are based on, but try to stay away from the games if you can...

E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL (Atari 2600, 1982)
Complex Says: We know we pick on this game a lot, but that's why it was made! All that money was spent to secure the rights to the movie just to create a game so terrible that it made you want to gouge out your eyes just so you could stick them in your ears to muffle the horrible grating sounds. And also so you wouldn't have to see the game, nor the fear in the eyes of the children who knew that your soul had been robbed by a game about a periscope-necked madonna/whore figure. Wait, or were we the only ones who thought that?

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HOME ALONE, (SNES, 1991)
Complex Says: Once upon a time, one of the editors here DJed Macauley Culkin's birthday party. And when he asked us what we got him, we said, "not kicking your ass because of that Home Alone game that came out." Then he reminded us that he was having sex with Mila Kunis, and we were all like, "oh MAAAAAAAAAN!" And Mila Kunis was all like, "you think you're upset about that?" And then we totally boned her in the bathroom of the club. TAKE THAT, CULKIN! And the saddest part of that whole preceding story is that we actually did DJ his birthday party! That part is true! And we regret it every day!

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BACK TO THE FUTURE III, (Sega Mega Drive/Genesis, 1991)
Complex Says:
Okay, making a game out of the original BTTF we can understand. But making a game out of the third movie in the trilogy is just pure Westward ho-ing. Wait, wasn't Mary Steenburgen in that movie? We know Ted Danson's been givin' her the old Sam Malone, but she just keeps on getting hotter. And she manages to do it with a last name that sounds like "stinkburger," which is even more impressive.

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BILL AND TED'S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE, (Commodore 64/Amiga/DOS, 1990)
Complex Says: There was another Bill & Ted game for the NES that came out in 1991, but that wasn't as faithful to the movie's plot. And when it comes to a video game based on a movie about two stoners who travel through time and meet horrible celebrity impersonators, we demand some attention to continuity. Also, San Dimas High School football rules!

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CASPER, (SNES, 1996)
Complex Says: We try not to sit in judgment of certain video games, because it's good to remember that there are lots of types of people who play games, and everyone wants an experience that they can relate to. So to all you gay ghosts out there: enjoy yourselves!

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HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL: LIVIN' THE DREAM, (Nintendo DS, 2007)
Complex Says: You know who's dreamy? That Corbin Bleu, that's who. He can sing, he can dance, and he's named after a chicken sandwich!

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RESERVOIR DOGS, (PS2, 2006)
Complex Says: Your first thought was probably, "Damn, Reservoir Dogs would actually make an ill-ass video game." And it's true. Assuming, of course, that Mr. Pink was played by Steve Buscemi and not some Steve Buscemi stand-in that we can only think of as being named Stan Biscotti. Well, at least Michael Madsen agreed to participate, which is like a gold-leaf stamp of...going straight to DVD. *shrug*

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ENCHANTED, (Nintendo DS, 2007)
Complex Says:
Back off, man, we got this game for our little sister. We just had to play it through a few times to make sure there were no corrupting messages or anything like that.

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ROCKY BALBOA, (PSP, 2007)
Complex Says: The sixth? The SIXTH? You waited for the most over-the-hill version of Rocky to make a video game? Well, at least you don't even have to wait three seconds into a fight to hear the recovering junkies they hired to do the play-by-play howl, "Great blocking—he must be psychic!"

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JUMPER: GRIFFIN'S STORY, (PS2/Wii/360, 2008)
Complex Says: When a movie is that bad, we don't care if the game is finished—you call that shit off! You wipe the code, burn the hard copies, and claim ignorance all the way to the grave. Rumor has that Hayden Christensen tried playing this game, only to have his fedora jump off his head and over his face in a vain attempt to stop the atrocity.

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Tags: back-to-the-future, home-alone, reservoir-dogs
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