Get super tan.
Tanning is the foot binding of our culture. Though beautiful people come with incredibly varied complexions, from Christina Hendricks to Rihanna, our culture has convinced itself that tanning somehow makes you more attractive. Buy into it. Tanning is far easier than actually taking the time to get into shape, and you can't ruin your tan with a bag of potato chips. Sure, the end of the road for a compulsive tanner involves a leathery hide and skin cancer, but can you put a price on convincing yourself that a slightly darker skin tone will make you more attractive? We think not.