I wasn’t even aware of this sub-genre of bucket hats called the "tulip" hat. These particular hats from Decho are kind of fire, aren’t they? All I want to do is keep a soft pack of Newports in one of the pockets as if I was a cool lieutenant in Vietnam. You know, the one who teaches Charlie Sheen how to shotgun some loud out of his rifle and illustrates that war is hell and should be avoided at all costs. I will die heroically saving my platoon from an ambush. But my sacrifice and sense of humor will carry on to indelibly influence my squad as they win the battle AND the war. Or you know, I’ll buy this hat, wear it once, and my friends will go, “You look like an uncircumcised penis with that shit on.”