Probably the worst award show next to the Teen Choice Awards (do they still give our surfboards as the trophies?), the American Music Awards are a very particular brand of struggle and basically the music industry equivalent to winning a participation medal. When Iggy Azalea wins "Best Rap Album" over Drake on the first award of the night, you're in for a tough one.Β But, for some reason, a lot of big name celebrities show up there. As it is our God-given right to criticize celebrities and their stylists everywhere, we took to the red carpet and broke it all down.
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Nicki Minaj
Nicki's dress kinda looked like it just continued from her hair. Maybe it did? Also, it flares out so much because the gravity of her hips is accelerating the collapse of the Milky Way galaxy. That actually would be a more believable plot for Interstellar.
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Ne-Yo
It looks like a literal peacock's tail was turned into Ne-Yo's sportcoat. And, seriously, give up the fedoras already, bro. They can't be your only thing anymore. They're about as dead as those double monks you're wearing.
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Jaden Smith Tha Gawd
The Jaden Smith Experienceβ’ has basically become a brand because he is holding his fucking app up for the cameras. I'm done, bro. Contrary to popular belief, the revolution will be televised.
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Elizabeth Banks
I didn't realize you were contractually obligated to dress like your Hunger Games character off-screen too.
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Christina Milian
Christina Milian is apparently getting her own show on E! called Turned Up so, in an exercise in brand synergy, her boobs were very turned up. In fact, the pressure from the dress turned them upwards. Literally.
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Rita Ora
Rita, you look like the candle guy from Beauty and the Beast. BORING. Wake me up when this chick is finally Rihanna.