Buying A Pair Of Boots Vs. Buying A Horse

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To continue its 10th anniversary celebration, Wings + Horns teamed up with famed bootmaker Danner to drop a rugged boot that can replace your pristine set of sneakers when precipitation falls from the sky in the frozen form of a snowflake this winter. These Mountain Light boots comes in a completely blacked-out colorway (including the sole) and a Gore-Tex liner. If you were a professional writer like I am, you would know that you have to capitalize Gore-Tex because it's not just a normal material. Nah, that shit is actually a brand name on the level of Kleenex or Rollerblade. Look it up if you don't believe me. If that is not enough for you, the upper on these is made of a single piece of Horween Chromexcel leather stretched over, like, 90% of the boot. Have you ever see those one-piece uppers in person? They're so fucking intense. Yes, of course, these will set you back more than $400. You're basically paying for half of a horse to cover your feet, though, so when you think about that, shit makes mad sense. A real, live horse costs...um, okay, I have no fucking idea how much a real, live horse costs, but it's definitely more expensive than a pair of boots, or a dead horse for that matter.

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