Oh, you got them plaint splatted 'gielas? MO'FUCKER PLEASE. We're all about them v artistic, v orthopedic sandals now. The description of these sandals is 132 words long, which will most likely be way longer than this product post about them. I mean, the copy talks about some artist and his trip to Italy to make some Italian mural or some shit, but I stopped reading because everyone in the Complex offices just got free Shake Shack. YOU CAN'T EXPECT ME TO READ ACTUAL WORDS AFTER TWO BURGERS AND A CHOCOLATE SHAKE. Also, don't expect me to care about your opinions on Birkenstock sandals because, chocolate shake or no chocolate shake, your opinions are straight smash patty to me.
Image via Complex Original
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