Let's talk gooch and butt. Go back as far as you want, but this will probably employ at least two mirrors and at least three yoga sessions for flexibility's sake. Warning: you probably don't want to employ a scorched earth policy on your backside's secret garden. All that vegetation is there for a reason—namely to reduce friction. And in case you forgot basic physics, friction = heat. Heat = chafing/rash. Chafing/rash = tears.