You think your life is rough? I live with my fucking mom, bro. You think I’m crazy? You’ve never met my fucking mom. To be honest though, it’s fucking great. Like, out of this world awesome. Some people try to make fun of me, calling me a momma’s boy, telling me I’m worthless, not giving me money for college—fuck you, dad. I have to agree to some extent, though. I mean, that one time a year I’m lucky enough to sneak a girl up the creaky ass stairs to my mom’s attic, it is a little degrading to my self-esteem. But life is all about picking your battles and knowing your limitations. And best believe I know mine. Anyway, here’s the top reasons why I’m postponing moving out of my mom’s house.