Fuck a basic hoodie. That Hanes beefy joint from Target is a piece of shit. Are you still wiping your nose all over the sleeve? What is with that? Are you eight-years-old? C’mon man, get this Beams Plus joint. This is the hoodie so fancy they called it a jacket. But really, it’s a hoodie—just one made of wool with a quilted lining. So yeah, don’t let your girlfriend borrow this on her way out to hot yoga, which, by the way, is not what it sounds like. It's not strictly hot women in tiny, stretchy clothing. It's a thousand degrees in there and it smells like feet. YOU'VE BEEN LIED TO YOUR ENTIRE LIFE.

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