1) Alex Rodriguez, New York Yankees: 
Passes Willie Mays with home run No. 661. Gets 3,000th hit in style with home run No. 667. Arguably the MVP of the first place Yanks.

2) Nelson Cruz, Seattle Mariners: The man who's currently fifth in the American League in homers makes it into the starting lineup of the All-Star game as a DH.

3) Ryan Braun, Milwaukee Brewers: Speaking of All-Stars, the Brewers' Braun replaces the injured Matt Holliday to join the NL squad. A fitting reward for a guy who's kept his nose blood clean for almost two whole years.

4) Yasmani Grandal, Los Angeles Dodgers: One of the men the Padres traded for Matt Kemp makes his first All-Star appearance (at the age of 26), and does so for less than 1/30th of Kemp's salary.

5) Jhonny Peralta, St. Louis Cardinals: Wait, drugs are for losers? The starting shortstop for both the best team in baseball and the National League All-Stars tells us otherwise.

*Drum Roll*

Alex Rodriguez, New York Yankees: 
In less than two weeks, A-Rod will become only the sixth active player in baseball to turn 40 years old. And yet, he's turning back Father Time with a season that'd be a career year for most guys not named A-Rod. That probably leads you to one of two conclusions. The first is that he never needed PEDs. The second, you already know.