During a press conference on Monday afternoon, Brazilian national team coach Luis Felipe Scolari was asked about his thoughts on his players having sex on the nights before games during the 2014 World Cup. A little strange? You bet. But also: A very valid question! And the World Cup performance of the entire Brazilian team could hinge on his answer to that question. So…?
Well, somewhat surprisingly, Scolari isn't against his players getting down and dirty prior to World Cup games. He's actually fine with it. However, there are some boundaries that he wants to set for his players. Specifically, he doesn't want any of them to engage in any sexual acts that are too, er, "acrobatic" before matches.
"If it's normal sex, okay," he said. "If this is normal, it is normal. It is not sending oneself in the air too high."
So if you're on the Brazilian national team, you're free to do this:
And this:
And, if you want to do this, coach isn't going to stop you:
However, if at any point any of the positions above transform into this:
Or this:
Or—goodness gracious, come down from there!—this:
NO. Just no. Stop what you're doing and tell whoever you're with, "My coach is not comfortable with this."
Please, guys. Do it for your nation!
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[via The Street Journal]
