Sport: Baseball
Team: New York Yankees
Hateful Lowlight: His involvement in the Biogenesis scandal

The more we hear about Alex Rodriguez, the more we think he's a sociopathic serial killer who buries bodies in Central Park at dawn. His voice has a menacing resonance that gives us chills and no human being should have teeth that white. He's used steroids throughout his MLB career and lied about it repeatedly. His alleged use of HGH from the Biogenesis clinic makes him the most talked about athlete of the moment. The 211 game suspension and subsequent appeal process means you can expect A-Rod coverage to take up at least 30 minutes of SportsCenter's 120 minute run time for the next few months.

For all of the hoopla that surrounds his 19-year career, he has exactly one World Series ring and was probably peaking on rhino testosterone during that '09 run. In these trying economic times, it's painful to watch a guy collect $600,000 per week whilst sitting on the bench and spitting sunflower seeds. That agony hurts even more when that same guy gets in the playoffs, hits all of .120, and makes headlines for soliciting women's phone numbers from the on-deck circle.