3. Michael Vick
Criminal History: Sponsoring a dog fighting operation
Time Behind Bars: Two years
According to federal agents, Michael Vick hanged dogs. That's all you need to know, really. The Eagles quarterback started up a dogfighting enterprise, lied about his involvement, and ended up doing about two years (548 days) in the slammer for it. Wait, two years? We're not saying that Vick hasn't paid his debt to society but that's, like, what guys who sell mushrooms at Bonnaroo get.
Proving that you can get away with pretty much anything as long as you're a valuable fantasy football player, Vick recently signed a $100 million deal with Philadelphia less than three years after his release from prison.