This kid usually has a mad dorky name like Simon or Todd, and he’s always popping off at the mouth about things he shouldn’t know anything about. He’s always hitting you with brainteasers like, “What is the only state to border only one other state,” or telling you how you should drive your car. He is a pain in the ass, but you can’t tell him to shut up because there’s one more thing he knows, and that’s how to make you look like a monster to his parents and senior faculty members.