Gerald Wallace doesn't really have what it takes to be an FBI agent. He doesn't have a four-year college degree. He doesn't have three years of professional work experience. And he's already got a gig that pays pretty well right now, so it's unlikely he'll be available to flash a badge between the ages of 23 and 37 as the FBI requires. But that didn't stop the Portland branch of the FBI from actively trying to recruit Wallace this week during a Trail Blazers practice—just a couple of months after G-Dub mentioned that he'd like to join the alphabet boys after his playing days are over. Okay, okay, so we're pretty sure they did it just to score a couple of seats at a practice session, but seriously: How fuckin' cool would it be to see this guy protecting our country? [via Ball Don't Lie]