Over the years, celebrities have given some pretty asinine reasons for why they chose to get the tattoos they did (hi, Gucci Mane!). But it's gonna be hard to top David Beckham's most recent explanation. He got a tattoo of Jesus being held up by three cherubs on his chest a few months ago. But during a recent interview, he said that the Jesus tatt was actually not a tribute to JC but a symbol of himself. "It's Jesus being carried by three cherubs," he said. "And obviously the cherubs are boys, so it's kind of, my thought of it is, you know, at some point, my boys are going to need to look after me and that's what they're doing in the picture." Riiiiiiight. So, do your kids know that you're actually Jesus yet or..........? GTFOHWTB! [via Sportsgrid]