10 Popular Childhood Sneakers You'd Never Wear Now

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10. Dinosaur Sneakers 

As a kid, everyone loved dinosaurs. Everyone that wasn't scared to death of them, that is. The obsession with dinosaurs transcended everything from toothbrushes to toys, and of course, sneakers. Like most childhood obsessions, they get left in the past, or at least should be. Frankly, those ALIFE/ASICS dinosaur-looking things are frightening enough to keep us from wearing any prehistoric blasts from the past.

9. Spiderman Sneakers 

Chill out, Peter Parker. Comic books are still cool among some adult circles, but when it comes to your sheets and your sneakers you have to draw a line. (Hey wait, is this where Nike got the inspiration for the Kukini from?)

8. British Knights 

The chunky white uppers were all a part of that Zach Morris swag created in the late '80s and BKs were the shit as long as you weren't in the wrong 'hood. They were somewhat affordable but also set you apart from the K-Mart kids. British Knights recently made a comeback—actually, don't call it that, the new stuff wouldn't even have Kelly Kapowski giving you the time of day, but then neither would the originals now.

7. A Bathing Ape Bape STA 

OK, fine, you didn't wear these a kid. But you sure looked like one when you did. We wouldn't call ourselves tastemakers, but we know enough to realize that patent leather hoodies and those Bape STAs you bought to match are better off left in the past. And as for the Spongebobs, well... No matter how many pinwheel-colored fitteds are still in your closet, Skittles-inspired shiny colors should be left for Reading Rainbow viewers. Leave dressing like a 10-year old to the 10-year olds.

6. Batman Sneakers 

Let's be honest, the latest Batman trilogy might be tough to top by any trilogy—not just against other Batman flicks. That doesn't mean you should be taking it all the way back to the '60s with all-over print Batman logos. Even if Chucks are an easy canvas for collabs and customs, nobody wants to hear you running around yelling, 'holy strawberries Batman, we're in a jam' either, unless of course, you look as good as Meagan Good. 

5. Velcro Shoes 

Maybe you didn't get the whole swoop, loop, and pull thing down until a later age or your little ass was too impatient to lace your shoes before you started terrorizing the swingset—either way, Velcro kicks were the greatest. Nowadays, they're better left for those playing bocce ball or chess in the park and wearing polyester pants. 

4. Heelys 

How many times have you hit the mall with Paul Blart riding your ass the whole time for skating? This might not be exactly what you had in mind but at least you could get from Zumiez to Sbarros in less than a minute. Cool concept for us grown folk, but we'd probably end up breaking our collarbones. 

3. L.A. Gear "Lights"  

If you were an '80s baby then you remember these joints. You were saving up allowances for like a year to get your hands on the heel-illuminated kicks so you could stunt on your fellow homies during pick-up games at recess or show-and-tell. If you are feeling really nostalgic (and brave) you can still grab a pair for $110. 

2. Spalding Typhoon Pumps

The ADHD kid in us loved pumpin' these joints up like it was going to help us get enough air to touch the bottom of the net. Or just make noise and piss our parents off in a long ass car ride, right? Odds are you wanted the Reebok joints after seeing Dee Brown make history in them but the $100 vs $30 price tag made it an easy choice for mom and dad—parents just don't understand. 

1. Air Jordans Sans Air

Remember when you were in elementary school and all you wanted was a pair of Air Jordans? And how you saved and saved and saved, only to find out that your size was SKY Jordans? What, no Air? Maybe you need to be over a certain age for this, but the whole Sky thing was super-traumatizing—like having to order off the kids menu.