The bus is a necessary evil of city life, often your best or only option to get from Point A to Point B. Every day, you brave the elements – potentially extreme weather conditions, massive unforeseen delays, unbearable crowds and more. It takes a lot of courage to do these kinds of trips, especially at rush hour. For suburbanites who might not realize how good they have it, and who might even profess jealousy regarding the idea of letting someone else drive for them every day, here’s a typical thought process to prove just how wrong they really are:
The bus sounds like a great idea, because somebody else is driving you, you don't have to pay for gas, you don't have to worry about parking, and it costs way less than actually owning a car. When you first start taking it, you're so excited that you almost want to just jump right through the windshield while singing Billy Madison's "Back to School" just because it's the first time you've taken a bus since elementary school!
But then you realize that you have to stand in weather that is so cold that your face involuntarily looks like you're trying to show off a grille that you don't own.
... or weather so hot that it feels like your face is inside of a Creepy Crawlers oven.
All because of those damn indecipherable, inaccurate schedules!
Then you finally start to filter in, only to have that one person use nickels and dimes to pay.
You step in, look around, and realize there aren't any seats left.
And once you find your standing spot and think you're safe, more and more and more and more and more people keep pushing until you feel like you're stuck in the Star Wars trash compactor.
And unlike the subway, there’s nowhere to go if someone or something smells like a vomit-stuffed sushi roll.
You try to just keep to yourself, scrolling through Reddit, with your smartphone up to your chin, but you can't focus because everybody keeps knocking you off balance and you have to spastically grab for a handle.
So then you start to get angry at every little thing, like people listening to their favorite Spice Girls song on repeat way too loudly.
And you start giving people on the sidewalks death stares, because they're walking faster than the bus.
Having your own comfy car with armrests, your own music, climate control, and your favorite strawberry daiquiri air freshener starts to sound like heaven.
And every stop feels longer and worse than waiting for your girlfriend to try on clothes at the mall.
Traffic feels like it's purposely trying to ruin your life.
So each day you say to yourself, "I can't deal with this anymore, it's time to buy a car," because you want to be all like ...
But the next day, there you are, standing at the bus stop yet again.