Mazda Scrum Wagon
What It Is: A teeny-tiny van.
Why The Name Sucks: Misters Merriam and Webster tell me that scrum means "a tightly packed or disorderly crowd." While the name is certainly accurate, given this van's pathetic stature, that's really not the trait you want to advertise. It's like if Ford had called the Pinto the "Ford Fiery Death" or if Daewoo had called all of its cars the "Daewoo Total Shit-Piece."