A week has passed since the release of Dave Chappelle's double-feature Netflix special, yet one urgent question remains unanswered: Why was Dave rubbing his belly so damn much during the first special, The Age of Spin?
The belly rub, though not an entirely new facet of Dave's stand-up methodology, inadvertently became the star of the show for several viewers:
Sadly, at least one viewer was even driven to the brink of psychosis by Dave's belly-rubbing:
In an effort to continue bringing you the stories that really matter, we have decided to once again flex our proven detective muscles by presenting a few theories. Without further ado and related fuckery, let us ask again: Why is Dave Chappelle rubbing his belly so much?
Dave Is Hungry for the Souls of Lesser Comedians
Though the specials' release hasn't been without controversy, the critics largely agree: Both specials, The Age of Spin and Deep in the Heart of Texas, show a master of the craft returning to the ring. But imagine how it must feel to be a less legendary, arguably shitty comedian while watching back-to-back Dave sets. Then imagine how it must feel to be this same less legendary, arguably shitty comedian reading about the rumored $60 million Dave got for these. Then, just for fun, imagine how it must feel to be this same less legendary, arguably shitty comedian when you notice that Dave keeps rubbing his belly as if to signal he is indeed hungry for your soul. That's one hell of a power move.
Dave Is Just Hungry, in General
Food is fucking cool. I love food. I can imagine that nailing, say, a joke about O.J. Simpson in front of a very receptive audience works up quite an appetite. When the souls of lesser comedians aren't immediately available, food will most certainly suffice.
Dave Is Just Fucking With Us
Dave is probably aware that writers making vaguely livable wages online to write shit like this will continue to, um, write shit like this. Perhaps Dave thought, "Hey, maybe if I rub my belly enough, Twitter will catch on and some low-ranking writer will be assigned an entire fucking article about it over at Complex!" If so, genius. If not, then fuck it. I'm getting paid. (*Editor's note: This writer will indeed be paid for this article, an article about a comedian rubbing his belly)
There Is No Reason for This (or Anything!) Because Everything Is Meaningless
Now this is more like it. If nothing really matters, then potentially everything matters. If life has no purpose, then we can ascribe meaning to something as inane as a comedian rubbing his belly because, like, what the fuck else are we supposed to do while stuck on this planet? After all, stand-up does society a solid by providing perspective on this meaninglessness by making it all seem funny as hell. The least that we in the audience could do is obsess over a belly rub.
Reps for Dave Chappelle did not immediately respond to Complex's request for comment. To be fair, I wouldn't respond to someone asking me about my belly rubs either.