Kylo Ren is a complicated man. At once a (SPOILER ALERT for the two people who somehow haven't seen The Force Awakens) vicious murderer and a semi-hopeless romantic, the confirmed greatest tweeter of all time has successfully built an entire brand out of being the first Star Wars character to possibly (probably not) be directly influenced by one or more characters from any given My Chemical Romance concept album.

As for Kylo’s (MORE SPOILERS, two weirdos) dad, Han Solo, his personal branding has way more to do with being a brash but mostly ethical space cowboy. Just imagine the profound awkwardness of attempted fam time between these two. Better yet, thanks to Tumblr user Mamalaz getting some notice from Uproxx, just peep some of these theoretical adventures below instead.

A devout man of misguided faith, Kylo once again attempts to preach the good word of Supreme Leader Snoke to his disinterested father:

Kylo Ren, apparent fan of sugary sodas, begrudgingly orders a Coke when his disinterested father shoots down his hopes of bringing some dark order to the galaxy:

Uncle Lando, once again paying an unannounced visit, pesters a presumably cold Kylo Ren to please put on some pants before a disinterested father ruthlessly amplifies Kylo's dry cleaner woes:

There's even an amazing "Why did Kylo Ren cross the road?" joke, but we won't spoil it here. Peep the full Modern Solo Adventures saga in all its Tumblr glory right here.