Miller High Life, the beer your frat brother roommate used to actually drink from a champagne glass as he watched an annoying amount of Workaholics while "studying," now has a much more inspiring walking advertisement in the form of 110-year-old New Jersey resident Agnes Fenton. Fenton credits her daily intake of High Life, with a palette-pleasing accompaniment of Johnnie Walker Blue Label, as the key to becoming a proud supercentenarian.
Seven vice-fueled decades ago, Fenton's doctor (perhaps jokingly) prescribed her "three Miller High Lifes a day." Fenton maintained this prescription, alongside the aforementioned whisky, until her caregivers recently decided to omit the daily alcohol due to her decreased appetite.
Fenton's revelation falls nicely in line with a recent study from the University of Texas, which shows that those who choose to abstain from alcohol may actually be contributing to an ultimately shorter life:
"The study found that mortality rates were highest for those who had never had a drink, lower for heavy drinkers and lowest for moderate drinkers who enjoyed one to three drinks per day. Of the study participants, only 41% of the moderate drinkers died prematurely compared to 69% of the nondrinkers. Heavy drinkers had a 60% mortality rate which is still a solid 9% less than those who abstained."
Shots, anyone?