Watch or Washed: What's on TV This Week?

Image via Complex Original

Verdict: Washed

Where: Syfy

When: Friday at 9 p.m. EST

Why: If you watched Syfy's The Twilight Zone all New Year's Eve and New Year's Day, you, like me, were bombarded with commercials for this, the cable network's great new original programming hope of 2015. By hour ten of the Zone fest, Stockholm Syndrome kicked in—what had once seemed kind of lame started looking good, like an intriguing mixture of Fringe and Looper.

In reality, it's just Syfy's own Sleepy Hollow, minus the enjoyably self-aware campiness. Based on Terry Gilliam's 1995 sci-fi mind-bender, which starred Bruce Willis and a bug-nuts Brad Pitt, 12 Monkeys follows time-traveler James Cole (Aaron Stanford), a man from 2043 tasked with preventing an apocalyptic pandemic from wiping out 94% of the world's population in 2015. Cole "splinters" (the show's term for time-travel) back to 2014, teams up with virologist Cassandra Railly (Amanda Schull), marvels at old-timey things like cheeseburgers, and catches the attention of a shady medical conglomerate.

There's plenty of energy in 12 Monkeys' first episode, but there's also a dominating sense of been-here, seen-this. Save yourself the multiple hours' worth of commitment and stick to Gilliam's original movie—nothing in the 12 Monkeys pilot can compete with Brad Pitt at his craziest. —Matt Barone

Verdict: Washed

When: Tuesday at 8 p.m. EST

Where: NBC

Why: It really hurts me to say this—it hurts as much as it did when Lil’ Sebastian died—but Parks & Recreation lost it. The show, instead of having a “Will they or won’t they?” running storyline, has had a “Will it be canceled or not?” storyline for years, and the uncertainties have painted P&R into corners again and again. Several episodes in the past have been framed as potential series enders because, as far as showrunner Mike Schur knew, they could have been. But time and time again, P&R has gotten the renew (without the network’s full-fledged support), so basically, they’ve wasted their good surprises on the bozos who showed up late to the party.

Parks is tired and fractured, a shell of its former (admittedly great) self. There’s no doubt that the fans who’ve stuck with the show through its first six seasons—myself included—will tune in as NBC burns the remaining episodes off over the next month or so. But that slight sting we’ll all be feeling as we watch? That’s the realization that Parks is washed fucking with us.—Andrew Gruttadaro

Verdict: Watch

When: Wednesday at 10 p.m. EST

Where: FXX

Why: It’s amazing to think that this is the tenth season of Always Sunny. How!? The misdeeds of the worst five people in the greater Philadelphia area are just a part of life now apparently. But maybe I haven’t noticed how long the show’s been on because it continues to be really funny. Just when you thought there couldn’t possibly be any more disgraceful, borderline evil antics for “The Gang” to get into, Season Nine dropped classic episodes like “Flowers for Charlie” (written by Game of Thrones creators D.B. Weiss and David Benioff, which is a trivia question waiting to happen) and “The Gang Makes Lethal Weapon 6.” The show isn’t doing anything new, but that’s really not an issue here.

Always Sunny is still churning—Dennis, Dee, Mac, Charlie and Frank are still redefining the bottom of the bottle. And if early whispers are any indication, the show is dead-set on continuing its surprisingly consistent run.—Andrew Gruttadaro

Verdict: Watch

Where: FX

When: Thursday, January 15, at 9 p.m. EST

Why: Last year Sterling Archer and his team of moronic super-spies left ISIS for a life of coke-dealing and country music. IMHO, Archer Vice's Scarface​-meets-Miami-Vice format resulted in one of the best seasons of the series yet, while others missed the spy shenanigans of the first four seasons. Welp, for those who want to see Lana, Pam, Krieger, and the rest of the gang back and what they do best (worst?) Season Six has you covered.

While last week's premiere saw Archer dealing with the emotional fallout from his new baby in the only way he knows how (going on an epic bender in Thailand with some lady boys), this week sees Archer and Lana  back in the spy business teaming up with none other than Conway Stern, whose hand was severed by Lana way back in Season One. But tiven their history, can Conway be trusted? We'll see! Aside from the pairs usual hijinks, however, Season Six promises to continue to delve deeper into Archer's psyche. As I argued last year, Archer may be a cartoon, but Sterling himself has grown a third dimension. Watching the egomaniacal agent deal with his growing family and feelings for Lana should prove weirdly rewarding, even as the show remains remains as irreverent as ever.—Nathan Reese

Verdict: Watch

When: Wednesdays at 10 p.m. est

Where: VH1

​Why: I'm not big on chick flicks, but I've got a long history of caping for Chick TV™. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the adventures of inspirational, well-adjusted role model males like Don Draper and Walter White as much as any other guy. But unlike some of you basic bros, I've never been shook to admit when a show whose target demo is arguably of the female variety is pretty damn good. Not "guilty-pleasure" cop-out, but actually, admittedly, fire. And really, should intended demo even matter? Heat is heat. Throw in the fact that I always appreciate good re-do/road not taken stories (Sliding Doors, 13 Going on 30, hell, even this sitcom nobody else remembers) and really, there's no way I was ever going to dislike VH1s new scripted series, Hindsight.

Our heroine is Becca (Laura Ramsey), whom we find on the eve of her second wedding, this time to a Safe Choice simp who's been in love with her for their whole lives. Naturally, in worrying if she's about to make her second mistake, she flashes back to the first marriage citing it as the inciting incident in a series of events that have her full of regret in 2015. Then, after a suspect (magical? Who knows, don't question it) elevator ride, she literally flashes back. It's 1995, Wedding Day One, her parents are still together, her kid brother hasn't done several tours in rehab and best of all, she and BFF Lolly (Sarah Goldberg) are still tight. Now she's got the chance to do things over, but interestingly enough, the right move isn't always clear. Does she go through with her first marriage and use her foresight to avoid a toxic break-up this time? Or is it inevitably doomed? Does she tell Lolly about the mysterious fight that was big enough to make the inseparable friends lose contact in the present, or can she skirt the issue altogether?

The best thing about Hindsight is how inherent the '90s nostalgia is. Instead of drowning in knowing winks (save a few requisite references to AOL, smoking laws, the rise of Patrick Dempsey), the show straight up feels like something you used to watch on The WB. It's the kind of series we'd normally be prepping a twentieth anniversary, GIF-heavy list for right about now. Ramsey makes Becca worth rooting for even despite a few selfish decisions, and what's more, she and Lolly might be the next great TV duo since the Gilmore Girls. If you're the type of TV connoisseur to keep a rom-com on deck, Hindsight is a must-check. —Frazier Tharpe

January 5

Banshee: Watch

The Challenge: Battle of the Exes 2: Watch

Togetherness: Washed

Girls: Watch

Agent Carter: Watch

December 29

Mozart in the Jungle: Watch

Marco Polo: Washed

The Missing: Watch 

The Twilight Zone Marathon: Watch 

December 22

The Heart, She Holler: Watch

Darknet: Watch

High Maintenance: Watch

Homeland: Watch

The Honorable Woman: Watch

December 15

The Eric Andre Show: Watch

2 Broke Girls: Washed

The Affair: Watch

MasterChef Junior: Watch

Elementary: Washed

December 8

Black Mirror: Watch

Sons of Anarchy: Watch (but it'll probably be Washed)

Bob's Burgers: Watch

New Girl: Watch

Modern Family: Washed

December 1

Toy Story That Time Forgot: Watch

Peter Pan Live!: Hate-watch

Foo Fighters: Sonic Highways: Watch

The Comeback: Watch

A Very Grammy Christmas: Washed

November 24

State of Affairs: Watch

Gotham: Washed

Black-ish: Watch

Homeland​: Washed

Carmilla​: Watch

November 17

American Horror Story: Washed

Shark Tank: Watch

The Newsroom: Watch

The Missing: Watch

Reign: Watch

November 10

The Walking Dead: Watch

Sons of Anarchy: Washed?

Homeland: Washed

Supernatural: Watch

Peaky Blinders: Watch