You don't owe Bill Cosby a damn thing. Beyoncé was probably drunk out of her mind when she recorded "7/11." Your grandma can't cook you any food because she's dead. Kim Kardashian isn't that important—and other musings on male rape, How To Get Away With Murder, and that life size scarf Lenny Kravitz is out here suffocating in. Enjoy.
Michael Arceneaux is from the land of Beyoncé, but now lives in the city of Master Splinters. Follow him at @youngsinick.