The 10 Worst Things About Being a Senior in College

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Frustration: Your four years of independence were a delusion.
How to deal: Plan your next step. 
The next step: Move out for real. 

Assimilating into real life starts with good ol' mom and dad—remember them? If you do have to move home, don't stress about it. I can name more friends that have moved back home after college than haven't. Your old room looks just the way it did before you left and your mom still pries for the sake of prying. My only advice is to savor the alone time and home-cooked meals while you can. Just don't get too comfortable: Moving back home for a month or two is one thing, but you don't want to be a townie forever. 

Frustration: Younger, smarter people are everywhere. 
How to deal: Realize that you seemed younger and smarter once, too.
The next step: Befriend your rivals. 

Accept the fact that younger people will surpass whatever minuscule level of innovative zest you once had and prepare to settle for mediocrity. Just kidding. You have it in you, but it's pretty crazy how different the world looked just three years ago. Just consider those bright-eyed youngsters as a little healthy competition. Also, nothing places your youth into perspective like receiving an invite on Facebook for a "4/20 in June Bong Party" which should be popping into your notifications any day now.

Frustration: "Do we stay together?"
How to deal: Acknowledge that all things must end. 
The next step: Use the alone time to focus on your future.

Staying in a relationship after college isn't easy. Money comes first and timing is everything. Sometimes compromises can be made, but when you weigh how young both of you are and the slight possibility that the care-free haze of college may have affected how much you really like each other, you might take the job across the country and promise to stay friends. Trust me, you'll be OK sooner than you think. 

Frustration: You put off a freshman math class until the very end. 
How to deal: Buddy-up with an exemplary freshman.
The first step: Trade their answers/guidance for beer.

Liberal arts majors know what I'm talking about: You put off a freshman math class or Intro to Statistics until the last semester of college. Now you have to dig up that TI-89 you haven't seen since high school and remember what a secant line is. But aside from the inconvenience, core credit classes can be sort of fun if only because the subject matter is vastly different than your major. Think of dissecting a rat for beginner's biology as decompression before meeting with your thesis adviser.

Frustration: Pressure to get a job after college.
How to deal: Pretending to not care what your family thinks.
The next step: Try to actually find a job.

Thanksgiving break rolls around and Uncle Bill and Aunt Gina are wondering whether or not you'll be a lawyer with an M.D. by the end of the year. You mumble something about having a few potential opportunities lined up as they shake their heads with pity. Your uncle will then offer you a data entry position at his scaffolding company, that you kindly turn down (hopefully). Luckily, you could not care less about their approval, and shock them by mentioning "taking a year off" or "traveling" or "trimming weed in Denver." Then you can happily spend the rest of the evening at the kid's table while worrying that your family is probably right. 

Frustration: You are suddenly broke.
How to deal: Cut down on expensive sandwiches. 
The next step: Go grocery shopping.

Somehow, out of no where, finances are no longer a whole-clique-faded, "Sure, I'll buy you a handle of Seagram's 7, pay me back whenever..." sort of situation. As you'll find out, budgeting is harder than giving a full-grown man a piggy-back ride. So what category of spending can you cut the easiest? Food. I know, the thought of making a bagged lunch is embarrassing as shit, but you have no choice so snap out of it. Your loan payments kick in shortly after graduation, so hopefully the anxiety resulting from massive debt will make you more frugal. 

Frustration: No control over your emotions.
How to deal: Distract yourself with nostalgic drinking games.
The next step: Cry into your beer.

The changing tides of your daily life can do a real number on your sober psyche, let alone when you've had a few drinks. As the countdown to the end begins you'll find yourself drinking heavily, forcing friends to come over at odd hours for company, and boozing alone when they're not around. Solitary drinking in such a state will further plummet you into the depths of old Drake mixtapes, swiping through Facebook party photos, and feeling nostalgic for two months ago. 

Frustration: You'll never be able to learn for the sake of learning ever again. 
How to deal: Pay attention in class.
The next step: Start reading for fun in your free time. 

Sooner than later your once-fluid collegiate speaking patterns will run dry and deteriorate one unnecessarily big word at a time. You'll struggle to think of words like "patronize" and will continually misuse "binary" until you're too ashamed to say it at all. So, unless (for some senseless reason) you decide to go to grad school, maintaining your intelligence will be solely up to you. Look to the least dumb people in your family and ask what they're reading, pick up a book for fun, and smoke less bong.

Frustration: It seems like everyone is moving to L.A.
How to deal: Be honest with yourself about what you want in life.
The next step: Could L.A. be a good move for you too?

Deciding to make a big move is different for everyone. Some people feel comfortable picking up and leaving even if they don't have a secure career path in mind. Some find it irresponsible to take a leap of faith and move strictly for the sake of moving. Maybe everyone's not moving to California or New York—maybe it's only one well-dressed kid in your class and you're anxiety is causing you to make generalizations. If you do plan on moving across the country, do it for yourself. 

Frustration: The best of things always come to an end.
How to deal: Lots of body contact/hugging.
The next step: Take excessive group photos, get tattoos, etc.

Some, if not all, of you will disperse and you'll have to start all over again with a new batch of friends. These new people probably won't share the same affinity for Sheryl Crow's greatest hits, but maybe they'll actually pay utilities and not use your tweezers on intimate parts of their bodies. Then again, maybe your new roommates are just old friends from high school and the party goes on. Either way, make the best of the time you have left.