In the latest Hella Bandwitch, a former platinum rapper asks her fans for gifts via Instagram, something about feminist ass cheeks, a hilarious response to Zoe Saldana's latest bad decision, and a look various assholes being terrible people online. Oh, and Solange because...c'mon, she left us no choice. Peace in the Middle East... and the Carter-Knowles household. 

Michael Arceneaux (@youngsinick) is a writer, but some days when he looks at his student loan debt, wishes he worked at The Players Club. For more of his work, check out The Cynical Ones.